Blog Number Nineteen: Rhayna, Hatebreed vs. Avenged Sevenfold, Blogging, and Syd Barrett

As always, any questions, concerns, complaints, or suggestions can be sent to razorsedgeblog@gmail.com. ALL emails will read, disseminated, and laughed at by our crack staff before we answer them...on crack.

Before we get to the topics at hand, WE'RE FUCKING BACK BITCHES!!!! After about a month on hiatus, The Razor's Edge is back with a whole new blog crankier than ever. So what it's been a month, what the fuck are you gonna do?

Quote Of The Day

"You don't have to hate a man to completely destroy him."

-Vince (Woody Harrelson), 'Play It To The Bone'

The new site that should have been infecting cyberspace like a virus a couple of years ago is currently being worked on and, as of tonight, will be one step closer to its completion. There is no target date because, as we already know here at the Edge (and all of our former professors know back in college), we fucking suck at hitting deadlines.

There is a big rumor floating round the net about a new addition to the cracked out staff here at the Edge and I , John McCaurthur, am here to set the record straight. The ink is drying on the contract as we speak to bring the beautiful, the erotic, the sexy Rhayna, The Mistress of Rock to the fold. Who is Rhayna? How did we meet? Read her goddamn blog to find out more about the woman, the myth, the legend (in her own mind).

Speaking of making good music together (I know we're not, but I was looking for a transition), we here at the Edge want to officially declare the true patron musical saints of this blog a band from New Hampshire called Hatebreed.

These are the kind of guys you would not want to fuck with in a dark alley, but at the same time deeply desire to sit down and drink beer and philosophize with in a watering hole somewhere. I mean really, look at these guys to the right. Meet then in a dark alley somewhere, and you're not leaving alive...not to mention we here at the Edge have a hell of a lot of respect and admiration for the style of music Hatebreed plays while writing deep, positive lyrics meant to help and not hurt.

Compare these metal gods to weak-assed, punk wanna-be assholes like Avenged Sevenfold.

Then take Avenged Sevenfold...look at these posers to your right; these guys look like a cross between a bad gay tattoo mag you could only find in a Harley Davidson shop and the 1980's hair band Poison. Talk about a REALLY, REALLY bad Social Distortion ripoff. This is NOT punk music. Ever heard of The Clash, The Sex Pistols, MC5, or the Circle Jerks?

This is post-punk pop dribble constructed and invented by record companies in order to squeeze more money from tween girls who cannot decide whether or not to bring their Hello Kitty backpack to a rainbow party.

Please Avenged Sevenfold, please die in a fiery bus crash. In fact, I'll trade the one and only Cliff Burton for the five of you jackoffs.

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And now for the topics at hand:

I, John McCaurthur, am far from a spokesman for anything (with the exception for Hatebreed). Nor am I, or the rest of the crew of the Edge, plan on being leaders for anything. Any blogger or podcaster will tell you the main reason they blog or podcast is for one main selfish reason: they want to say something you, the viewer/reader, might think is cool because their individual blog or podcast is the greatest thing since sliced coffee.

We, as bloggers/podcasters, put our souls up for scrutinization so you, the viewer, will be entertained. We put our pictures, poems, even video of us masturbating or having sex in order for you the viewer/reader to be titalated and want to come back more and more to our sites. It seems to the cracked staff women enjoy posting their most private and sensual of information more than guys, but are we complaining?

But I digress.

The reason for this rant is someone (you know who you are) posted a picture of themselves in a VERY skimpy American Flag-style bikini and the picture lasted about a few hours on this certain site. The reason for the dismissal of the photo is unclear, whether or not it was modesty that led to the removal or the significant other got weary of the post or the person in the picture was just wearing too much fabric (one can dream :) ).

We here at the Edge will never put any personal photos of ourselves (especially yours truly) on razorcast.net because, in all honesty, we are ugly motherfuckers. I, John McCaurthur for example, am a hybrid of the Elephant Man and the Hunchback of Notre Dame (but only the good parts).

I can respect modesty, I truly can. But for Christ's sake at least send the bikini/nekkid pics to razorsedgeblog@gmail.com for further review. If I cannot be a talent scout, at least I can be a great master debate-r.

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While still in high school, I met a girl whom I found incredibly attractive and irresistible. She was an older woman (a year or two), and she had a car. She was a very sexual being, and she and I hit it off instantaneously. Our relationship was fueled by this animal magnetism, wanting to tear each other's clothes off each time we saw each other.

We, as I remember, had to get in some form of nekkid passion each time we would get together. We would drive to a somewhat secluded parking lot at a church near my parents' house and she and I would smoke cigarettes, listen to Pink Floyd's "The Wall," and get with the making out and oral sex and mutual masturbation.

Even to this day, I will drive by that same place and get a tingley feeling where I should get a tingley feeling thinking about that girl. Every time I hear certain Pink Floyd tracks (Empty Spaces, Wish You Were Here, and Young Lust to be specific) I admit I get a bit hard think of her and what she did (to me....yeah baby!).

When I awoke this morning I fired up the machine and read that Syd Barrett, co-founder of Pink Floyd died recently, I felt that this world lost a great musician, an incredible musical mind, and I personally lost a part of my past.

I wish I would have met Syd Barrett to thank him for his vision of Pink Floyd. I hope he can find peace in the next life.